Old Navy is for posers
So, yeah, I totally hate Old Navy because it’s a store for posers. Everyone is so immature and they totally play establishment music. It’s all trip hop and stuff like that. That, and there are so many kids there. That’s why I shop at the Gap. They’re the store for members of the sophisticated intelligentsia like me. They cater to my educated interests, with their light pastel colors and computer-generated smooth jazz. Yesterday, I bought myself a new pair of unisex overalls. They make me look so ironic, because I’m not a farmer! Dude, I’m so ironic, I’m Kafkaesque! That, and I think that unisex clothing represents the universality of humankind. I think we get too hung up on labels like “ladies petite” or “maternity.” Dude, they’re just labels and by wearing unisex clothing, I’m doing my part to fight the gender-stereotype establishment. I can feel as masculine or as pretty as I want by wearing nothing but androgynous overalls.